From an early age I got the idea that talking about money was awkward and emotional. I saw difficult money conversations play out at home and at some point I decided it was best to not talk about money at all. Less tense that way.
Unfortunately this idea caused me far more suffering than a simple conversation ever could have.
Can you relate?
Avoiding these ‘difficult’ conversations meant I never asked for more money at work. Not once. For over a decade, I didn’t negotiate my salary.
Word to the wise: financial freedom trumps a few minutes of social awkwardness any day.
I also ducked and weaved to avoid conversations with my partner about what I was spending, what I was earning and what we needed to do to successfully manage our money together.
Shying away from money talk kept me stuck in an oppressive under-earning pattern for years. I had no idea how to break it. When I finally vowed to make a change, I knew I had to get over it and start talking.
If I wanted to earn more money, I had to push through the fear and ask for it – no one was going to offer it to me. I used to think that employers would see my ‘brilliance’ and shower me with promotions and raises. Life doesn’t work that way. So I started to ask for more.
I did my research, built my case and started putting myself out there for a six-figure salary – something I had only dreamed up before. Within two months I secured my first role with a six-figure salary and it felt amazing.
Actually what felt like a financial miracle was really the result of taking a few basic steps. I got clear on what I wanted, moved past my fear and had the conversation.
Here’s how I got what I wanted in 3 moves:
- I wrote down the number I wanted to be earning and focused on it daily
- I found roles offering the salary I wanted, mapped my skills accordingly and built my case
- I stepped up, told the fear to take a backseat and scheduled the conversations
Did the fear just magically dissolve once I decided to ask for more? Hell, no. But as the saying goes, courage isn’t the absence of fear, it’s taking action in the face of it.
So if you’re anything like me, you may have short-changed yourself over the years out of fear. You’re definitely not alone in this – many, many women can relate.
But I’m telling you, you can overcome it. You can step in, step up and have the conversations that will lead you to more success, more money and a greater sense of self-worth.
So what do you say? What’s more important? Your fear or earning the money you’re really worth? I hope you’ll agree that it’s time to ask for more.
Something to ponder over the week ahead,